I could totally sense that there were gaps. That there were scenes which in the book were, no doubt, very well explained (I have not read that one), but it did not transfer into the film. So: weak.

I have always admired Daniel Radcliffe’s lack of talent. The role of Harry Potter – which is like crazy-money deal – and he cannot act. Now I am forced to add to that: not only is he a terrible actor, he is so far from the hot-lists it’s sad. Such an opportunity, such a waste.

I heard that the last film is supposed to be let out as a ‘to be continued’ crap. My advice: get the hell out of there while you are still resting on your laurels. Witches and wizards are out, vampires are in, and god only knows how long they will last. You are on a sinking ship, I can feel it. I have not heard potter-buzz this whole year, you are all getting less cute every year… except for Ron who is surprisingly masculine and strangely hot – but those qualities are not for goofy idiot sidekicks!

And how the hell are you going to put Harry Potter next to Ginny Weasley in a couple of years: she can already spit on Potter’s head!

I remember when the first film came out. I went there with my whole family, we drove an hour to get to the cinema, it was winter (I think) and the car windows were frosty. Radcliffe acted as bad as he does now, everyone was as cute as a button… Now, many-many years later there’s Lionman Ron, Ghostboy Draco, Fuckme-Hermione and Harry “the Midgetman” Potter, making you wonder: when was New Moon coming out again?

Now here’s an Edward I’ll never get tired of. I haven’t seen most of his movies, but the few that I have seen have made an impression on me. First I think I saw American History X. Which in itself is a great film, but with Norton there, it becomes a hell of a lot better. Then Down in the Valley, which is also great. The Hannibal sequel (something Red Dragon or whatever), The Painted Veil, then Pride and Glory. Cannot recall the other things I’ve seen, although I’m pretty sure the list does not end here.

I read on IMDB that he usually plays conflicted characters, people with multiple personalities, really those guys who have major inner battles. And yes, looking back at those movies I can definitely see that.

And he’s hot. (Had to say it. Otherwise it would not be me. Good  old shallow me.)

You know what? Although I thought that it was better than the rest of the horror movies of our age that are based on surprise only, I think it was worse than the aforementioned movies because I was not scared at all. Yes, I enjoyed the fact that it was not built solely upon the whose-scary-silhouette-was-that factor. But since I was more laughing than scared I think they would have done a better job if they had put at least one more surprise moment in there.

Then again, I am a bit tired. Who the hell cares what this movie is about. I won’t watch it again, at least I know that much. So I think the movie sucked. Yeah, let’s go with that option.

The actors who played the so-called psychopaths did not act very well. I did not believe them. My boyfriend said they’re like farmers. So that kind of ruined the whole I-am-afraid-of-you-because-you-are-a-scary-psychopath aspect of this film.

It was kind of like a horror drama, though. Because it involved a realistic situation with a girl being raped and all. And it wasn’t like a deformed child of Satan in the middle of Nowhereville killing college students who had taken the wrong turn somewhere and consequently ended up as wax dolls. The killers were simple outlaws. Your everyday rapists and murderers.

But I don’t even care right now. All I know is that I was not scared, which I should have been, and I want to sleep, which I should not. Which leads me to conclude that it was not a very good horror film.

Where are the good horror movies anyway?

Summer of 2005. Oh, that was one good summer. We were in camp (sort of) and in love with David Bowie’s Space Oddity. On the first picture: me and PB on a field outside our camp residence, gathering flowers to win the clean-up-your-rooms contest. We won. Our magnificent interior design piece ’Busted Old Bathroom Sink With A Dirty Broken Bucket Containing Some Wild Flowers’ that is shown on the second picture (which also shows my cleavage)  stole the spotlight. Shots by Helmut.

Summer of ‘09 went down the drain, I guess. Well, I’d better make up for it in 2010.

Holy shit, it’s 2010 in a few months already! Wasn’t the turn of the century just a few years ago? Man, I hate the fact that I can say things like ‘oh, that happened 10 years ago’ or even ‘man, that was 20 years ago’. I’m getting old.

I’m getting old! I mean I am 21. This year I had my last meaningful birthday. Now I can legally drink vodka and gamble. Yay. The next big birthday is my 30th, which is in 9 years and in the meantime I have to accomplish something. Well, next year I’ll get my BA. Then it’s straight to some other school where I can learn something that is actually useful. So that’s 4 years planned ahead right there. Then maybe I want a Master’s Degree. That’s 2 more years. So that makes 6 years. Which gives me 3 years to get a “grown-up life”. And then I’m 30. And then I’ll get 16 kids and 7 divorces.

Now that sounds sad. I gotta make some changes as I go along, otherwise I’ll greet my 30th birthday as a vegetable. I like cucumbers, though.

I found the work of Guido Crepax many years ago and he is unquestionably one of my greatest heroes in the art world. He has been the main influence on my aesthetic sense. My love for the dark-haired Valentina is evident in my own scribblings, I guess. She is gorgeous. Especially when she is naked. Which is frequently.

Look at her. Perfection.

… is the sweetest old man I know. He is quiet and keeps to himself, and most of the times I don’t know how to communicate with him, but I love him dearly.

I remember one time when he was sad. He told me he had been driving his tractor on a remote road. Whenever baby frogs were on the way he would stop the tractor, move the baby frog to the side of the road it was trying to get to and drive on. But he did not see one little frog until it was too late and he accidentally ran over it. He was sad all day.

I just could not resist. Pathetic. True Blood has made me into a 13-year-old girl once again. Sad. Just… Sad. Kind of fun, though.

With Godrick greeting the sun one of my hopes and dreams about True Blood went down the drain. I just really wanted Eric and Godrick to hit it on and have steamy gay sex. Really. It would have been hot.

But on the brighter side of things it looks like Eric and Sookie are about to have a little more passion in their relationship! Whoohoo! And now that it is on the schedule I once again feel like Sookie is the lead character and not a goofy idiot sidekick.

True Blood is back on its right course. YAY!

Plus Eric and Sookie make a much hotter couple than Bill and Sookie. Just look at the pictures below and, surely, you can see that Bill is history. You are fried, Bill! Make way for the Viking, you sissy Confederate! Here comes Eric with his sexy Scandinavian superiority!

WOW

The people involved in making this film knew exactly what they were making: a bad movie. And they had fun with it. So they actually made it into a good movie. So it turned out to be a really good bad movie.

In addition to being a funny zombie movie, it’s a funny zombie movie with strippers. Zombie strippers! I mean how much better can it get? But that is not all: the leading zombie stripper is played by Jenna Jameson. She starts falling apart and she literally eats men alive and boy is that fun. And she can act! Robert Englund plays the owner of the strip club and he is definitely in it for the fun. The other actors act deliberately bad, which results in good bad acting. Another oxymoron, hell yeah!

To Patrick Magee, the guy responsible for the zombie-look of this movie: you are an artist.

Plus, the things the characters say… A few favorite quotes of mine:

“The virus stays more pure [transmitted] from woman to woman, but once you get a man in there, like everything else, it all goes to shit.”

Zombie-Jenna reading Nietzsche:

“This makes so much more sense now.”

Bad guy lights a cigarette:

“You guys should smoke more. Not enough kids smoking these days. It’s so fucking cool.”

You have got to see Zombie Strippers!

While hanging around in the vast nothingness of the internet I have come across many comments saying Kristen Stewart sounds like a man.

I’m sorry, what? Kristen sounds like a man? I have not noticed it. Seriously.

I was confused for a while, but then I got it:

Vanessa Hudgens.

People have seen High School Musical too many times and I reckon they are under the impression that Vanessa’s voice is what a teenage girl’s voice should be like. I am very sorry to inform you that Vanessa’s vocal carrots are the most alien things in Hollywood right now. Who needs Knowing when we have Vanessa, right?

Kristen is a breath of fresh air next to this Disney House of Squeal. She sounds like a young woman and not a dying animal which I honestly cannot say about Vanessa.